WHO IS … ?


Click and read the “Rules” link, fans! Then email me your answer, and YOU could win the FREE WEEKLY PRIZE! -Rob!

Guesses this week included Ricky Sprague’s “THE UNKNOWN LYNCHER…Billy White [who]was a grand wizard of the Ku Klux Klan…inundated by radiation by the blast of the atomic bomb, ironically turning his chalky white skin the color of Louis Farrakhan’s…and fights to make the streets safe for racists!”


John Desy guessed “The Pulverizing Pink Peckerwood!” He added, “I hate to ruin his gig, but his secret identity happens to be Randy Jackson, great foreteller of musical talent from Hollywood, USA. I believe he borrowed the mask and undies from Ryan Seacrest.”

This week’s “Most Thorough Guesser” Award goes to Mike Bowles, who guessed, THE CHICKEN CHOKER, auto-erotic man, “auto-erotic asphyxiation” (which he acknowledged doesn’t make for a very good vigilante name), The strangler, The real S & M, “And when we look into those big ol’ sad eyes… we see the soul of a man who’s in the craft and wants so much more of himself…” Sacrificialigion, Sacrosaint (defined at urbandictionary.com as “one who has taken the art of blasphemy, unorthodoxy, and taboo to a new level. An ascended master of naughtiness, a genius at vulgarity as an exercise”), and “ball sack” (which he acknowledged couldn’t be right since we’ve already seen a Ball Sack)! Whew, Mike!

Benjamin Ilka guessed “The The Rosy Fowl Throttler! I can see him now all sweaty and frustrated as he throttles his fowl in a dark truck stop bathroom!” As usual, be it English or French, we appreciate that you use two “THE”s in the name, Benjamin!

Kudos goes to Benjamin for going that extra studious step! He wrote:

“It seems that all of these characters have an all too similar package! Could they all be the same person!!!! Intriguing! I’ve included my research collage.”

Unfortunately, his optimism for the study of balls must have got the best of him! Even a casual glance at this “ball package research collage” makes one thing evident! Each of these balls (eight sets, seventeen balls total) are unique and individual! No one man could possibly have all these balls! And you’ll see a lot more balls coming on these pages, in the following weeks! Upon explanation, Benjamin argued, “What if he was able to rotate his balls to mask the similarity?” Which just goes to show how people cling to their beliefs, regardless even of evidence presented in their own “ball package research collages!”

And last of all, Tyler Rork had this guess, too late, about last week’s Camel Toe! “…he is only apparent in the presence of euroshorts or spandex, but his noticeable absence in all recorded pictures of one Lance Armstrong (despite the spandex) has yet to be explained.”

And the lucky winner of our weekly prize is…Mike Bowles! We’re so proud of you, Mike! and we’ll be in touch about the FANTASTIC SKETCH you’ve just won!!

Everyone, thanks as usual for all the literary sleuthing, and good luck in next week’s contest! -Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!

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