TABLOIA mailer #13, December 28, 2006

TABLOIA MAILER # 4650

EXCITING MYSPACE UPDATE!

Thanks to a world of eager socialites out there, Chris has been making some very close, very dear new friends at myspace! What good friends he’s become with celebrities, comedians, movie stars, famous bands, cartoon characters and company mascots or logos, a bunch of professional wrestlers from the eighties, and even people who we had always assumed were dead! Imagine the fun Chris is having with his living and dead and imaginary friends, as they begin hangin’ out together, pal-in’ around, listening to music together, discussing personal secrets, sharing relationship troubles, asking if they can drive him to the airport, having sleep-overs! Because that’s what friends do! If you haven’t stopped by yet to become Chris’s best friend, please be sure to visit http://www.myspace.com/chriswisnia right away!

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DORIS DANGER NEWS!

DORIS DANGER IN OUTER SPACE, featuring out-of-this-world giant monster pin-ups by Peter Bagge, Dave Gibbons, Al Feldstein, and JH Williams III, has been in stores for a few weeks now! A scant 16 pages/comic-sized/all ages/$2.50! If your shop missed it (and they most likely did, looking at our order numbers!), tell them, “IT’S NOT TOO LATE!” Tell them: “DIAMOND ITEM NO: OCT06 3628, if you ci vous plait!”

Chris sent out review copies, and we’ll keep you posted as those scintillating reviews begin pouring into the streets!

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DR. DEBUNKO NEWS!

There is no news at this time! Happy holidays!

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CHRIS’S FIRST WEB COMIC IS GETTING CLOSE!

DICK HAMMER: The Dailies! In the popular and too-often-requested newspaper-strip format! Mystery! Murder! Arson! Action! An attempted murder that leaves a man in a wheelchair! Suspense! Not one but TWO cases of amnesia! Mistaken identities! and love gone sour … DEADLY SOUR! Give us a few more weeks, fans! And then begin visiting www.chriswisniaarts.com every week or so … for DICK HAMMER: THE DAILIES!

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DIARY OF A STRUGGLING COMICS ARTIST
See it for yourself at https://chriswisniaarts.com/blog.shtml !!!
Chris’s blog recounting his adventures as a self-publisher are beginning to get some attention! His personal tales have been linked and referred to as “depressing,” “sad,” and “pathetic!” Also, the Xeric Grant began referring eager and excited potential self-publishers, calling us “an invaluable resource!” Presumably, that’s to help them understand just what a nightmarish hell of misery the world of self-publishing is! Our personal favorite critique came from http://tlonista.wordpress.com/2006/11/ , whose diary entry of Sunday, November 26th, 2006 read:
“Dear Crazy Future Self,
“I know you’ve always loved drawing, but don’t love it this much. [and here linking to Chris’s uplifting diary! Then continuing:]
“If you’ve still got your heart set on starving to death in a cardboard box under an overpass on the Gardiner Expressway, save time, effort, and the cost of art materials. Be a philosopher.”
If that’s not a validation to start reading Chris’s blog, then there can’t be one! Thanks for the kind link, tlonista.wordpress.com!
In case you’re wondering why there were no entries for a few weeks in November, here’s why! Chris’s blog site suggested he upgrade to a new version! When he did this, he found he could no longer edit his previous posts! He also found that he couldn’t add any new posts! It took him a few weeks to figure out just what a piece of $%?@*!! his upgrade was, and then to finally scrap it completely, and manually re-enter all sixty-plus of his previous entries!
When he first launched the blog, Chris was trying to pump out five or six diary entries a week to get his seven-year pre-history, and two-and-a-half year publishing history caught up to present! You can imagine how all that reading intimidated so many fans!

Now he’s only about ten months behind on his history! For this reason, Chris plans to slow to a leisurely and consistent one mere entry a week … FOR NOW! So all you readers better use that time to catch up while you can!

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VITAL DEVELOPMENT! RIVETING UP-TO-THE-MINUTE MYSPACE UPDATE!

We made a rushed and wrong assumption above, in our EXCITING MYSPACE UPDATE announcement! It turns out, Chris has asked a number of 1980’s professional wrestlers to be his friend, but none of them have agreed to actually be his friend! Only the great, legendary Harley Race, who you could technically argue is a 1970’s wrestler, wanted to be Chris’s friend! Naturally, Chris is saddened and shaken up by this “dis” of people he legitimately yearned to be his friends! He’s had to reevaluate his view of his own popularity, but he insists he won’t let it affect his work schedule!

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Merry Christmas from all of us here at Salt Peter Press, Fans! Except for Dr. DeBunko, who’s an atheist!

–Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!
Don’t forget to visit www.chriswisniaarts.com today!

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Wonder why in the hell you got this annoying mailer? Feel free to reply with the heading “UNSUBSCRIBE!” We promise not to tell Chris, what with him in his current no-professional-wrestlers-for-friends state-of mind!

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